Remembering Christmas Past

This was our first Christmas without my mom.

Over the last few days, I've found myself thinking a lot about Christmases in the past...and mom. Mentally reliving different Christmas memories over and over again and wondering...if only we had known then what we know now.

I remember the Christmas that my dad presented my mom with a really large box. We all wondered what could possibly be in such a large box and thought it was very exciting that the large box contained another box...and another box....and another box....I do not remember how many boxes (to a kid, it seemed like a lot) there were, but I remember the new ring my mom found in the smallest box and was very excited about.

I remember the Christmas when I found out who Santa Clause really was. Santa had brought Lego to my siblings and I...regular Lego for the older kids...and big Lego for my younger sister. My sister had no interest in the big Lego...but wanted to play with the regular Lego. I over heard my mom telling my dad in the kitchen that they should have gotten my sister the regular Lego. Aha! Now I knew who Santa really was.

I remember Christmas mornings when my siblings and I would race back and forth between the living room and my parents connecting bedroom to tell them what Santa had brought us...squealing with excitement. We did this even in the years after we knew who Santa was.

I remember Christmas mornings when after all the presents were unwrapped, dad would bring out his presents for mom. Showering her with perfume, clothing, and jewellery. She would be excited about each one...just as my siblings and I were excited to see what gifts dad had hidden from her.

I remember the last Christmas before mom got sick. My sister and I (with families) stayed over night on Christmas Eve. After all the kids went to bed, my sister and I started to fill stockings. Mom got out her bag of toys and stocking stuffers...excited to be able to play Santa with her grandchildren.

These memories may not be that interesting, but they allow me to visual and remember my mom as if she was still with us today.